Rebecca’s Webpage

I wrote the other week about a few things I’ll miss about living in Australia. Now that we are here longer than we thought we’d be, I’m starting to look forward to the conveniences of the USA. Just like I didn’t intend my “things I’ll miss” posts to sound like complaining, I certainly don’t mean this to either. I love my home here, and I know I’ll love my home there, where ever “there” is.

Parking Spaces: I think there must be a different law in the USA about how many available parking spaces there are for supermarkets and malls. I am always searching for parking, even at 10 a.m., even at 4:30 p.m., even at 7:30 p.m. Monday-Saturday, I’m searching. It was so bad at Christmas that we left the mall without ever finding anything after driving for 30 minutes, giving up our schedule family portrait time. It’s bad every day.

Drive Thru: I’d love to be able to stop at an ATM without getting out of my car. I’d love to be able to pay for gas at the pump without going in to the station. I’d love to give my car a carwash without having to go into the station to pay for it. There are so many conveniences that just aren’t in Australia. Is it wrong for me to not want the grocery store checker to check my card signature? It’s much faster if I don’t have to keep my wallet out. …

Consumer Goods: I needed some more make-up ( foundation): $18 for a small tub. Is it that much in the USA? I stopped to browse at the bookstore: $26.99 for Margaret Atwood’s The Blind Assassin. A few weeks ago, I bought jars of baby food: $1.99 for 170 grams (about 5½ oz). Because everything is expensive, there aren’t as many options for consumer goods. I’m looking forward to affordable prices again.

Books: See note above about Consumer Goods.

A New Car: I get to buy myself a car, my car, to last for 5+ years. I’m very excited to go for test drives! (My husband probably won’t get a car until he gets a new job, which we hope is soon, but might not be for a few months yet; we’ve been a one car family for more than a year now and I never thought we could do it.)

Service: Tips are not expected at restaurants. It was nice at first, but I’m really looking forward to some actual service from waitresses or waiters: it’s like they make an effort to ignore us and only come if we look annoyed. It would also be nice to be able to order pizza and have it delivered. I haven’t actually ordered pizza since college, but it’s the fact that I can’t that bothers me!

There are a number of other reasons I’m eager to move back to the USA (namely, family!) but this’ll be all for now.

We may get a departure date soon!

Tags: moving day

Signing

After I asked you for your opinions on signing and other things, I decided to sign every word I can remember to Paul. The day after I started signing everything, Paul started “babbling” in sign. It was so cute! Now he consistently signs “More” but I don’t think he actually knows what he means. Video at Paul’s Page.

(I’m starting to feel conflicted as to which site to put these things on: it’s about Paul so it should be on Paul’s Page, but I’m the one trying to figure things out, so it should be on my page. I guess I can’t separate him from me anymore!)

Sleeping

As for sleep, Paul’s been going from 6:30 or 7 p.m. until 6 or 7 a.m., except for the few days lately when he’s awoken screaming in the night or in the early hours. I’m pretty sure it’s teething but I’m hoping we can get back to a normal schedule. I like the waking up at 7 a.m. thing! I wish it happened more often.

Eating

I’ve figured it out what to cook for Paul. I refuse to make food for myself without salt, so for now I’m still making two separate dinners. Paul eats at 5 and we eat at 8 anyway, so it’s not that big of a deal. But Paul’s food tastes pretty good these days! I really like pumpkin. It’s a good base for just about everything.

TV/Movie Watching

When do kids actually notice TV/movies? We don’t have a TV but I did try to introduce Paul to Winnie the Pooh, watching it on my computer. He didn’t pay attention for more than 5 or 10 minutes.

I ask because I want to buy Signing Time and I’m not sure it’s worth it for such a little boy who won’t sit still anyway. It’s not that I want to encourage TV watching anyway, so I might as well wait, I guess. We do have an actual TV screen in storage, so we’ll have it again when we return to the USA. (We still won’t have TV, though.)

Toys

What is the best kind of toy for a 9-month old? I’m still relying on his rattles and other 6-month-old toys and they are just not enough for him. (I was going to wait until we got back to the USA to get more toys, but I’m tired of waiting and he’s bored!) I got him a ring tower and today I’m going to look for a peg puzzle. Any other ideas?

Tags: being a mother, my baby

I’m still in Australia.

Why, you may ask? Good question. Here’s a rambling answer:

USA Client wanted Husband to do Said Project. Australia Client said if USA Client asked politely for Roll-Off (i.e., finding another person to do Husband’s job and sending Husband and family home), then Roll-Off would be in three weeks. Husband agreed to perform Long-Distance Telephone Consulting for Said Project during Roll-Off period. USA Client promptly neglected to ask Australia Client for Roll-Off. After one month of Husband performing Long-Distance Telephone Consulting for Said Project in early Australian hours of morning, Australia Client said to Husband, “No Roll-Off until USA Client asks for you,” and USA Client still didn’t ask Australia Client for stated Roll-Off. Why? Because Long-Distance Telephone Consulting is cheaper than Flying Husband to Virginia each week. So, Husband stopped awaking for 4 a.m. Long-Distance Telephone Consulting for Said Project. Now USA Client for Said Project says “Help, or we’ll find someone else,” Husband says, “Arrange Roll-Off from Australia Client or find someone else,” and Australia Client says “I won’t allow Roll-Off if USA Client doesn’t need you.” So Husband and family are waiting for someone’s mind to be made up. As soon as Said Mind is made up, Roll-Off will happen in about three weeks. Husband and family will then return to USA.

Clear as mud, huh?

Tags: jobs, moving day

When my sister and I were young, we watched Mary Poppins almost every day. One favorite part was when Jane, Michael, and Mary were taking their medicine after being caught in the rain.

“Lime cordial, delicious!” says Jane.

“Strawberry, Mmmmmm!” says Michael.

My sister and I would take a spoon, pour water or something in it and pretend it was magicked into delicious lime or strawberry cordial.

This last week, I bought cordial.

Cordial = Kool-Aid.

It was so disgusting. It was so disappointing.

I’m just a first time mom. I’m sure some of the rest of you “pros” could help. Please, share your insights!

Sleeping

• At eight months old, how long can my baby go at night without eating (i.e., how long can he sleep)? Is it okay to expect him to sleep 10-12 hours?
• What’s a reasonable bedtime for an eight-month-old? (Right now, he’s asking for 5:30-6. OR ELSE.)

Baby Signs

My wonderful sister gave me a baby signing book for Christmas and I’ve been signing to him, pretty much just some basic signs: FOOD/EAT, MOMMY, DADDY, BATH, MORE.

I haven’t gotten any indication from Paul that he understands these signs, but he did start communicating via his own sign.

Smacking his lips together/opening his mouth and closing it = I WANT TO EAT NOW

It’s quite cute to realize I can understand what he wants!

• If you signed to your baby, how long before they actually started to respond? Did they make up their own signs?

Eating

• Canned baby food tastes like dog food here; not really an option. What did you feed your no-longer-pureed-food-but-still-not-quite-adult-food baby?

Tags: being a mother, my baby

What’s in a name? that which we call a rose
By any other name would smell as sweet

I have always loved my given name. It is so beautiful, so complete. I dislike the fact that I never went by it.

I don’t like my nickname.

I tried to go by my given name when I was a teenager. I told the temporary staffing office my given name and I succeeded for three weeks as a receptionist before I forgot and answered the phone with my nickname. In despair, I gave up. I decided I could never remember to refer to myself by my name—the nickname was so ingrained in me.

When we moved to Australia last year, I told my husband, again, that I’ve always wanted to go by my given name. He told me, again, that I should go by it then. Why not? With him as my support system, I have. For the past year, I have been “Rebecca” to everyone I meet. And I love it.

• Rebecca is an adult.
• Rebecca is a wife.
• Rebecca is a mother.
• Rebecca is an active, participating member of a ward.
• Rebecca cooks dinner for her family.
• Rebecca feels competent with her everyday responsibilities.

Whenever someone calls me “Becky,” I think of pigtails. I imagine my buck teeth. I feel insecure again.

• Becky is a little girl.
• Becky reads The Babysitters Club.
• Becky is afraid of the stove and cries at the thought of cooking.
• Becky sits by herself, secretly wondering why no one is her friend.

Now, whenever I do something dumb, I hear myself say in my head, “That was dumb, Becky.” Every other time, I refer to myself, in my thoughts, as Rebecca. I love being Rebecca. I finally feel like me.

At some point in the coming month (still no departure date), I’ll leave all the people who know me as Rebecca. I’m returning to a place where everyone calls me Becky. I am very sad to leave my identity here in Australia. I’ll never feel like myself again, completely.

I know, I can continue clarifying my name for everyone I re-meet for the rest of my life. But some people have already made it clear to me that they don’t intend to even try to remember that I’m Rebecca now.

Sigh. I love my name. Why can’t anyone else remember what it actually is?

Note: If someone you know signs their name in a particular way or calls themselves by a particular name, why wouldn’t you refer to them that way? I just don’t get it.

ETA: To all reading this post, please understand that I don’t mean to offend anyone! My purpose in writing this post was to show that there is something I’ll miss when I return to the USA from Australia, going by Rebecca, and that when I return to the USA, I will be fighting to be Rebecca instead of Rebecca-by-default. I sorry if that offends you; offense was not intended.

Tags: growing up, trials

A few months ago, when Paul started to sleep through the night, I’d wake up in the morning terrified that I’d find him dead in his crib from SIDS.

At his eight-month checkup, I was told to stop feeding him pureed food—mix chunky/mashed foods so he learns how to chew. Now I feed him his meal, terrified that he’s going to choke on his food and die, right before my eyes.

He’s becoming mobile now, and I’m realizing that the next step will be terror that in the two minutes I turn around, he’ll put his finger in an outlet and die from electrocution (even with outlet covers…). Or fall down the stairs and die. Or grab at something that I didn’t mean to leave out and choke on it and die. Or cut himself on something sharp I thought I’d put away and bleed to death. Or…

I could go on. All these terrors keep recurring in my mind.

Someone responded back in December that these fears aren’t from the spirit and I shouldn’t worry. But really, they are all very possible. And if he dies because of something I did or didn’t do, I could not live with myself.

When will I stop worrying that my son will die? Or will I always worry?

Tags: being positive, my baby, my family, trials

Can you write your memoir in six words?

Here are my attempts:

Redheaded girl married then birthed redheads.

Learned to read, Reid-ed, still reading.

[or, if you prefer]

Learned to read, Reid-ed, still Reid-ing.

What is yours?

Tags: my family, my writing

Today, I found a list on a sticky note inside my pocket hymnal. Because of the items on the list, I believe I wrote it when I was traveling in the Middle East with my BYU semester abroad eight years ago. It’s amazing that the note is still sticky after all these years.

Happy Thoughts

• laughing
• the Ah Ha moment
• blowing in the wind at the front of the boat [on the Sea of Galilee]
• sunshine
• blue skies
• talking with friends
• hope
• clear, starry night
• humming along with songs
• a dance beat
• finishing something
• holding a sleeping baby
• testimony

I wish I remembered what “the Ah Ha moment” is. It sounds so nice.

What is on your Happy Thoughts list? Was your list different eight years ago?

Tags: being positive, testimony, The Gospel of Jesus Christ

One sunny 50-degree winter day last July, I walked to the supermarket. I was 7 months pregnant and brand-new to the country. Outside of the supermarket fly six Australian flags. As I walked by the first of the flags, the flags flapped in a light breeze. I looked up to see a beautiful, blue-sky backdrop for the Australian flag. I decided then that I was home, and I loved it.

Today I walked up to the supermarket again, as I have many times in the past months. It is now fall, and I crunched leaves as I walked down the street, pushing my almost eight-month-old in the stroller. As I walked under the flags, I felt a sense of sadness: I’m leaving.

What I will miss: Being 10 minutes from the temple.

The temple is open for about four sessions a day Wednesday through Saturday, and it is such a lovely, friendly temple. Saturday morning at 9:25, I decided to go to a session. I made the 10 a.m. session (I don’t like to rush to get ready; it just worked out well this week). I will miss being so close.

What I will miss: Being a short drive from mountains and empty fields and little traffic.

Sunday afternoon we went for a drive. We didn’t go anywhere in particular—we just drove. Because we live where we do, we could drive for 10 minutes and be away from traffic, among fields with cattle grazing. It is so lovely here. I will miss the scenery of Australia.

What I will miss: My husband walking to and from the train station every day.

My husband comes home every night. When we return to the USA, he’ll go back to flying to his work Monday and returning home Thursday. We’re obviously looking at other options; I’ve been spoiled by his presence this year. I will really miss being so close to a train line, with his job on the end of it.

Sigh. Still no departure date, but it is certainly going to happen.

Tags: moving day, my husband, road trip, temples