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I look back at the lack of photos and details from my first pregnancy and realize the same thing is happening this time! I’m not keeping up with this, and I’m amazed (but very happy….) to see that there are just 11 (eleven!) more weeks until baby Caroline’s due date.

Of course, most days, eleven weeks seems like an eternity, since I know I will be getting progressively more uncomfortable. Here are some updates as to how I’m doing and how our family is.

First, I have to say it is fantastic that there are so many holidays in the fall. This makes it feel that time is passing more quickly! It’s helping Paul too, because he has milestones to look forward to: his birthday, Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, etc.

Paul is very excited to be a big brother. There was a time around his birthday and Halloween when I wasn’t sure what he was thinking — people kept saying “Are you excited to have a little sister?” when he’d get this vacant look in his eyes and not smile. But since then he’s become rather excited. A few stories.

One day near Thanksgiving, we were in the supermarket getting groceries and I couldn’t resist: I had to stop by the little baby clothes. I saw an adorable “Santa” dress for babies: it was bright red velvet with white fur on the collar and sleeves.

“Oh, this is adorable!” I said.

Paul could reach some of the lower shelves and he said, “Look! here’s one in 4T! I can wear this one!”

I explained that he couldn’t wear a dress: those were for girls, like baby Caroline.

Paul promptly responded, “Let’s go find some more adorable clothes for baby Caroline!”

A few days ago now, we were reading a book about a girl with a favorite dress. (I’m currently a round one judge for the Cybils awards, so we’ve been reading all sorts of picture books.) I asked him what he liked about it and he said, “It’s about a girl with a dress, just like baby Caroline will have! So I like it because it’s like baby Caroline.” He had different reasons for liking the book a few months ago when we read it: now it’s all about the “little sister” and “girl” side of things he notices around him, which he’s looking forward to embracing when Caroline joins our family.

He is certainly going to be a great big brother!

As for me, well, here’s a belly shot from when I was 26 weeks (three weeks ago now — that’s how long it’s taken me to post this!)

(Yes, it’s a bit out of focus. Apparently, my husband the photographer has a hard time just taking a picture of a person.)

I am wearing the same shirt (albeit four years older, stained and so forth) that I was wearing when I was 25 weeks pregnant with Paul here. I think I look bigger this time around…. and in the three weeks since I took that picture, I’ve gotten MUCH larger. I’ll take a 32-week picture to compare with my 32-week picture with Paul as well.

So how am I doing? Do you really want to know? If so, keep reading. If not, stop now. I don’t normally go in to health issues on this blog: it just seems so personal. But, this is partly a pregnancy journal too, and I miss not having my thoughts from my first pregnancy to reflect on. I was just too busy moving to Australia and getting settled, I guess.

Two weeks ago, my pelvic bones decided to split apart. I don’t recall this happening in the first pregnancy, and the fact that I pushed for more than 2 hours and Paul’s newborn head was quite smashed together suggests that it was a rather tight squeeze for him. So I’m hoping the fact that all of my pelvic bones are aching and sore will mean that delivery in February will go much quicker and with less difficulty. I was concerned at first, because I didn’t recall so much pelvic pain when I was pregnant with Paul. The doctor did a check and all was well. He did say that, unfortunately, I’ll probably just be in pain for the rest of the pregnancy. Great. So far, it has moderated a bit, so it’s not too bad.

I don’t have Gestational Diabetes or any worries about pre-eclampsia. In fact, my blood pressure is so low I am often dizzy. I can’t exercise by walking on the treadmill or using the elliptical anymore. I can’t even swim one lap of freestyle without stopping; it’s just too exhausting and hard to breathe. So I’m trying to bring myself to the pool a few times a week just to do breast stroke or elementary backstroke very slowly, to stretch, and use the pool weights. I don’t really feel like I’m exercising, but I guess that’s better than nothing.

Baby is a kicker. This may be my fault. With Halloween candy and then Thanksgiving and now Christmas fudge EVERYWHERE around me, I find I’ve been eating tons of sugar. Baby always responds to that. At any rate, from about 8 p.m. until midnight, I struggle to sleep because she’s so busy making herself known. I’m at the place in pregnancy where I’m waking up at night to pee, because of kicks, and because I simply can’t roll over to get comfortable. I’m so tired come morning.

Also, I have low platelet counts, which I’ve had for a few years now, but it is getting worse. Normal counts are above 140 or 150 (thousands). Before pregnancy, I was 100-120, with is not a big deal. Now that I’m pregnant, I’m  hovering between 80 and 90. It’s not a big deal until it gets to 20, 30 or 40, which is when I’d need a transfusion during delivery. Also, I can’t have an epidural if I drop into the 70s, but since I’m really wanting to go completely natural again, that won’t be an issue. I’d rather the epidural isn’t even an option!

Speaking of, I’ve had tons of pregnancy dreams that just made me laugh (and others that weren’t so funny).  The day after I watched The Business of Being Born (which I really liked; I think it gave a balanced look at the positives and negatives of home birth), I dreamed about my own baby girl’s natural birth, which was great, since it didn’t hurt at all (if only). I dreamt once that I was full term and kept telling Ryan we had to go to the hospital and he kept saying, “I’ll take a shower first” and “I’ll have some dinner first” and “I think I’ll go shave.” Baby ended up being born on the bedroom floor and Ryan (in my dream) was mad because the floor was all gross then and we needed new carpet. I’ve had bad pregnancy dreams: nightmares of surprise early delivery when I’m trying to find a babysitter for Paul and can’t and the baby ends up born on the bathroom floor. And then once I had a dream about my low platelet counts: I was delivering my baby and needed a transfusion so the doctor or nurse was running down the hall calling “Does anyone have A negative blood? Anyone? Anyone?”

Anyway, that’s me. I may look small (people still can’t believe I’m 7 months along!) but there is a full-sized kicking baby inside that makes it hard to walk, hard to sleep, and miserable some days because I’m just SO EXHAUSTED.

I must have a bad memory of pregnancy. But then, last time I was just a lot more positive I think. Here’s what I said at 36 weeks pregnant (which right now seems like a long time from now). Maybe it will get better again?